Jimmy’s opening monologue from the 90th Academy Awards. #Oscars
Between #MeToo, Hollywood’s ongoing attempts to curtail harassment and abuse within its ranks, and that whole thing where last year’s Best Picture was accidentally awarded to La La Land instead of Moonlight, Jimmy Kimmel had a laundry list of intimidating things he was expected to address during his second year in a row of hosting the Oscars. But in a monologue free of many bells and whistles — like, not even a single spontaneous burst into song — Kimmel managed to set ‘em up and knock ‘em down.
After kicking off with a self-aware warning that announced winners maybe shouldn’t “get up right away” to accept their award, just in case of another mix-up, Kimmel took a pointed turn into the uglier side of Hollywood that the Harvey Weinstein allegations brought to light.
The Oscar, he mused, is “the most respected, beloved man in Hollywood,” because he “keeps his hands where you can see them, never says a rude word, and most importantly, no penis at all.” (A solid joke, but my personal favorite part was him grinning that Oscar is “literally a statue of limitations,” which is so dumb it circles all the way back around to excellent — a classification that also applies to Kimmel promising a jet ski to whoever gives the shortest acceptance speech.)